lalala~: 2016

At 5.30am, 25 May 2016, my water broke. After days of threatening my boss that I will go into labor early, it's finally happening. It was supposed to be my normal check up but I suppose the baby decided to come out a bit earlier than expected. Whatever it is, I have been bugging Khairi with the same question, "Bila Adam nak keluaq ni?" at a rate of 3 times a day at that point and I was equally happy and nervous. After waking him up to tell that it's finally happening, we just lay there for a while, digesting the fact that we're gonna see the baby soon. There will no more be the two of us, there will be three.

Giddy Mommy and Daddy!

People told me that I didn't really look pregnant coz my tummy is not bloated, but whatever. As long as the baby is healthy, I'm okay. At least it wouldn't be hard for me to shed those baby pounds. Yeay hot bod!....notttt.

Chik tu nak tayang perut flat ja. Compare dengan orang nak p beranak satgi nun. Ceh.

Giddy Tok and Awan

So we went to the hospital that morning and it turned out that the baby didn't want to come out just yet. So I had to spend the night there but it was okay...at first. I'm sure the other mommies-to-be there hated me for laughing and making jokes with Khairi and my sisters and Mak Abah, coz I didn't feel a thing....yet. And then it was 7pm, and the mild contraction started. It was a little like period pain but it grew stronger as the time passed. I was awake the whole night and it was pouring outside with strong wind and lightning and stuff; announcing the birth of little Adam. Hahahah drama sangat kauuuu Adam. I paced around the ward the whole night, I couldn't get any sleep, I couldn't do anything. At 6am, that path has opened just enough for me to enter the labor room. I didn't hesitate one bit. I ate a few kurma and a mug of Milo, and I (thought I) was all set. It was 7am.

A few hours after that, still nothing. The progress was slow. I was tossing and turning on the bed and the contractions, urgh, the contractions were fiercely painful. Thank god for the invention of metal bedposts. There's nothing you can do but bear the pain when it comes and wait for it to pass. I was given the happy gas, but I didn't think it helped one bit. The nurses gave me a jab but I didn't think it helped either. The pain was unbearable. Khairi came in to check on me at around 12 noon, and I barely remember it. I was on gas and I think I looked like Helena Bonham Carter as Bellatrix Lestrange. He better love me still!

At around 4pm, I suddenly feel to urge to push. Thank God, it was time. Khairi came in and helped me through it all. It was long. I was in there bearing the pain from 6am till 4pm, with no food, just drips, and I was exhausted. I didn't have any energy and it was a long labor. During the labor, wild imaginations got to me. I imagined, what happens if the baby didn't make it coz I didn't have enough energy, what was I going to answer to my family? It was almost 45 minutes, and finally the baby was out. Too bad his Daddy couldn't be there coz the doctors were about to make a procedure and they had to ask Khairi to leave.When the baby came out, he didn't cry. He didn't have enough oxygen. They placed the baby on my belly while they cut off his umbilical cord. I turned my face away, I couldn't look at him. I'm scared that he was not breathing. When they asked me to confirm his gender, I didn't even get to see his face. They took him away to give him oxygen and cleaned him up. A few moments later I think I heard him cry, a soft, slow cry. I suppose he was a bit weak, and so was I. Moments after that, I dozed off, exhausted. When I woke up, it was already 6.30pm. I called the nurses to help me up and I wanted to see the baby and my family, I wanted to go out. But the baby was already in NICU and I knew my family was waiting outside for me. I switched on my phone (typical Gen Y) and saw lots of messages streaming in. It was amazing and touching to see those messages, asking me how it went. You know la kan, dah jadi Mommy ni semua benda nak touching kan. Hahahah feeling sangat.

The nurse pushed me on the wheelchair and I was grinning and beaming all the way. Mak said that I didn't look like I just gave birth. Hahah! I had less than 5 minutes to spend with my family before I was asked to enter the ward. Oh so sad. They waited for me for more than 12 hours and I only got to see them for 5 minutes. Sedih lagi. Feeling lagi! But it was okay. Everybody was relieved that everything was okay. Alhamdulillah. At 11pm, Khairi came back to the hospital after I buat muka kesian and begged the nurse to let me see the baby. The nurses were okay with it, maybe they knew we were first time parents and are still so giddy giddy hahah. So there we were, 11pm and he was pushing me in the wheelchair to see our baby! While pushing, he told me that the baby had one "defect". I was like, "Oi! Wrong choice of word to describe a newborn yang I tak tengok lagi muka dia dari tadi OMG". Dramatic, remember? It turns out that the baby's ear is a bit like his Daddy's; tikuih gerit. But rasanya as he grows, telinga dia rounded macam normal la. Lol.

So there he was! My Adam! Oh so small, lying in the incubator. His breathing was fast, I could see his chest moving rapidly. I couldn't see his face, though. I was only able to touch his little fingers, and his soft jet black hair. But I was content. Cukup lah dapat pegang sikit-sikit pun takpa. I think I smiled (and snored) in my sleep the whole night. You see, I'm the only one who doesn't have the baby with me in the ward coz Adam was in the NICU. So my sleep was uninterrupted, unlike all the other mothers. I guess it was my cheat day, one last cheat day of sleeping through the night. Teeeheee~

Adam's first photo!

The next morning, we went to see baby Adam again. It was 11am. It was feeding time. (macam zoo pulak). It turns out that he was fasting the whole night. Haih kesiannn lahir-lahir dah kena puasa. The feeling when I first touched him? Still so surreal. Can't imagine he was inside me the day before. Luls. Bimbo.